As Blue Kryptonite is to Bizarro Superman, facts are to The McChange Campaign. Just when we were all prepared to award Arbusto&Co the award as The Biggest Liar In All The Land™, along comes Johnny Come Lately and takes the title, war injuries and all, without breaking a sweat.
I grew up with Bizarro #1, in the era known as (no kidding) The Pre-Crisis Bizarro. Senator Johnny Mac is the Post-Crises Bizarro. The crisis is The Bush Presidency. Bizarrely—with all evidence to the contrary—as poll after poll show electorate is fed up with the direction the country is taking, MacLaine wants to keep on keeping on in the same tired, discredited, worthless direction.
But, then, get this: he comes out as the Candidate of Change™.
Worthy of a Bizarro moment in The Graveyard of Solitude. And speaking of graveyards? How's that Iraq War thing going for ya?
What can explain the lies, distortions, half-truths being peddled by The Repugs? Bizarro World! Even when the lies have been exposed for what they are, the campaign keeps repeating them in advertisements that are flooding airwaves and the Blogopolis. You don’t have to swing a mouse very far on the Innertubes without finding these electronic political hatchet jobs are utter bullshit. There are so many, I won't bother linking to them. Take a Google Drive for yourself on the Information Superhighway to see how you are being lied to.
The pick of Pistol Pakin’ Palin is nothing short of political expediency. Yet, McChange has falsely accused Senator Obama of willing to lose a war in order to win an election (I don’t think the phrase has been trademarked yet). How Bizarro of him.
Even the Alaskan state motto seems to have been designed by a Bizarro Ad Agency, in light of Sensational Sarah: “North to the Future.” This woman wants to drag us kicking and screaming to the past. Book banning? Seems okay with Censorship Sarah. Regressive sexual education? Sarah Zygote would take us back to The Dark Ages. Ethics investigations? Sarah has one of those and even tho’ she’s said that she wants to clear the air, she’s hired lawyers to throw up roadblocks. Cronyism? She's hired more classroom friends than a monkey's uncle. (Can we still say "monkey," or is that sexist too?) More Bizarro behaviour: Now that she’s on The Change Team, she no longer supports the very same earmarks that had been the hallmark of her administrations as Mayor of Wasilla and the Great State of Alaska. And, she's ordered friends and family to clam up. People are wrong when they say Palin is Cheney Squared. She's Nixon cubed. She even denies Global Warming, but Clark Kent knows better:
Here’s the crazy thing: Despite all the opposite behaviour exhibited by The Post-Crisis Bizarro McCain™, the polls have the election at a statistical dead heat these days. Only in Bizarro World would things be so completely opposite.
With all my love,